Questions

Did this need to happen?

Yes and no. No, not to punish or to make my husband or me change. And yes, to fulfill her purpose, my purpose and my families purpose in Him and to help us grow.
2 Timothy 1:9 who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began,

Would I change the outcome if I could?
No, I am perfectly content with where she is and that I might not ever get to hold her. My children are God’s first and He uses circumstances however He sees fit. Who am I to complain? He gives life, we do not. I have a daughter with a glorified body. I could never give her the kind of love that she has now. I love her more than I love how it feels to birth, hold, love and raise a child.

She had a disease, were God’s hands tied?
No I believe that nothing is beyond His control.
Matthew 6:6"Here's what I want you to do: Find a quiet, secluded place so you won't be tempted to role-play before God. Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage. The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense his grace.
I am glad that I found out she was not alive before her birth. So I could shift my focus from me to God. I had some time to process what I was going to go through and time to trust God to walk me through it all. God uses His children to help His children. What I go through that is difficult is not because of me but for someone else. Who does God want to help through my story? I am willing to give my baby to Him so I can help others feel and experience God’s perfect love like I did. The giving of one for many. Because of Jaden and her story many are coming to Christ.
Heb 9:28
So Christ died only once to take away the sins of many people. But when he comes again, it will not be to take away sin. He will come to save everyone who is waiting for him.